It doesn’t matter if you love him, or capital H-I-M
Just put your paws up
‘Cause you were born this way, baby
Behind every success in conquering the hindrances that life throws one’s way is a “grand plan; God’s plan.”
This, says Alleneca*, a 24 year old call center agent from Marikina, is something that life has taught him as a gay man who is a Christian.
Alleneca first worked in a shooting range cum arms company, where – he recalled – he was required to be stereotypically masculine to be accepted as part of this industry. “It was a challenge for me working in this kind of (industry),” he said. “I was often surrounded by manly and gorgeous (heterosexual-identifying) men. So I had to pretend to be one of them to avoid bullying.”
He chose to be in the industry because Alleneca was “a new graduate at that time and I needed a job badly.”
But Alleneca said that “I asked God to guide me in every day because each day of my work was like playing a role of someone who is not who I really am.”
He eventually resigned from his first job, ending as part of the business process outsourcing (BPO) industry.
“At first, I was intimidated by the other applicants who were fluent in English,” he recalled. But he persevered – and, currently, he has been in the industry for five years now. “In this industry, gays are (generally) very welcome. There is no need for me to pretend who I am. I am more productive due to the fact that I am accepted.”
“God never puts a person in a certain situation that he couldn’t surpass,” he said. “And so I always put my trust and faith (in a Higher Being). I believe that wherever life leads me to, God has a better purpose.”
As a Christian, Alleneca spreads his devotion and the word of God on a somewhat different mode. Alleneca is a drummer of a Christian band, aside from being a member of a worship team for a long time.
For Alleneca, “serving God as a gay person is a difficult task,” somewhat reminiscent to him when he worked in a factory of arms. “I know that the society condemns LGBT people – even those who go to church. According to many of the people who judge, the Bible clearly states that when you are gay, there’s no room for you in heaven. As a Christian, I feel sadness deep within me. I am worshipping God, I am playing music to God, I am inspiring people through my music; and yet I am told I am not worthy enough to worship Him.”
But Alleneca believes this sadness comes from listening to the opinion of others. At times, he said, “I almost forget that even straight people are sinful.”
And so, he continues using his passion in music by promoting God. “I have the gift and I want to use this gift to worship God regardless of my sexual orientation. This is my simple way of saying ‘thank you’ to Him because of the blessings that He gave to me, my family, health and my current work. I don’t want to waste my talent.”
For Alleneca, “serving God doesn’t need (for one to fulfill) any requirements like sexual orientation, gender, physical appearance or social status. These do not define the true meaning of faith. Rather, it’s the desire that your heart has and the willingness that you have for yourself.”
*NAME CHANGED AS REQUESTED BY THE INTERVIEWEE