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Sex toys can help in dealing with the shame and guilt of unexpressed sexual desires

It turns out that sex toys can help people find freedom from their sense of guilt, which often accompanies such unexpressed desires.

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A visit to the local sex shop can help couples deal with sexual guilt better. Most of the bedroom guilt we deal with originates from the harboring desires of a sexual nature that we are not comfortable about sharing with our partner. The ensuing shame is a result of feeling as if these desires are not appropriate, and those feelings are intensified with time.

It turns out that sex toys can help people find freedom from their sense of guilt, which often accompanies such unexpressed desires. As to how exactly products from an adult sex shop can help in that regard, we will explore the possibilities below.

The Psychology of “Play”

If you visit any sex toy shop online or offline, you will find that the tags mostly include terms that directly or indirectly mark them as toys for playing a game. Various sections have names such as roleplay, sex toys, sex games, etc. Most toys that you will find in a sex shop have been designed with the theme of play in mind. On the other hand, terms like equipment, device, tool, etc. are carefully avoided because they do not go well with the idea of playing a game. This is not a coincidence; there is a well thought out psychological aspect to be analysed here.

Similar to how a standup comedian can joke about sensitive subjects or take stabs at audience members without feeling guilty for it, the very conception of playing a game liberates our mind from guilt. The light-hearted theme of sex toys can unshackle us from the shame of our own sexual desires because they are, after all, just toys in a private game. In other words, sex toys change our perception of hidden sexual desires from something offensive to something that is playful.

Role of Sex Toys Beyond Play

After one or both partners get past the initial guilt by engaging in a game of pleasure, they slowly begin to perceive their sexuality as natural and normal rather than abnormal. Guilt begins to dissipate with each session, and the person becomes more and more sexually liberated with time. The toys, however, continue to aid them in exploring new areas of the human sexual psyche, without unnecessary shame.

Independence and Confidence

It has been found that older singles often suffer from severe sexual guilt and shame, irrespective of their gender. This is often a result of:

  • Not being able to find a partner
  • Having sexual desires without a partner to share them
  • Developing sexual fantasies that might not be accepted in society

An adult sex shop with its plethora of toys can help them come in better terms with their desires, even if they do not have a partner at that time. For example, if you pay a visit to Saints and Sinners, you will find that the online sex shop has a wide range of bullets and dildos among other sex toys. Of course, the sex shop also has advanced sex toys for men and women who are already past their sexual inhibitions and into serious roleplay, but these gateway toys play a crucial role. Since they symbolize the fact that a woman does not need a partner to make her fantasies come true anymore, that in itself acts as a liberating thought and experience.

Sexual pleasure was and still is to a great extent, considered in popular religions and cultures as a sin, which is where all our root issues with sexual guilt originate from. The sex toy, on the other hand, uses the psychologically acceptable perception of playing games to slowly liberate the mind from spoon-fed notions about sex, sexuality, and sexual pleasure.

Health & Wellness

Lesbian, gay, bisexual communities more at-risk for dementia – study

Social inequality makes less privileged groups, including sexual minorities, more prone to develop cognitive impairment. So making the society more just and more accepting of diverse sexuality may help prevent dementia and reduce related health care burden on society.

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Lesbian, gay and bisexual — or LGB — people are more vulnerable to one of the fastest-growing health concerns in the country: dementia, according to research from Michigan State University.

“Our study speaks to the unaddressed questions about whether members the LGB community are more likely to develop cognitive impairment at older ages and, if so, what factors contribute to their poorer cognitive health, ” said Ning Hsieh, an assistant professor of sociology at MSU and lead author of the study published in the journal, The Gerontologist.

“We knew that stress and depression are risk factors for many chronic health problems, including cognitive impairment, in later life. LGB people experience more stressful events and have higher rates of depression compared to their heterosexual counterparts,” she said.

Analyzing the elevated cognitive health risks among older members of the LGB community, the study was the first to use a national sample and screening tool to gauge cognitive health disparities between LGB and heterosexual older adults.

Hsieh and MSU colleagues Hui Liu, professor of sociology, and Wen-Hua Lai, a Ph.D. student of sociology — compared cognitive skills of 3,500 LGB and heterosexual adults using a screening tool and questionnaire that tests for six domains. Those areas included temporal orientation; language; visuospatial skills; executive function; attention, concentration and working memory; and short-term memory.

Social inequality makes less privileged groups, including sexual minorities, more prone to develop cognitive impairment. So making the society more just and more accepting of diverse sexuality may help prevent dementia and reduce related health care burden on society.

The researchers found that on average, older LGB adults were more likely to fall into categories for mild cognitive impairment or early dementia compared to heterosexual older adults. The team also tested for specific health and social factors — such as physical conditions, mental health conditions, living a healthy lifestyle and social connections — and the only factor related to cognitive differences for sexual minorities was depression.

“Our findings suggest that depression may be one of the important underlying factors leading to cognitive disadvantages for LGB people,” Hsieh said. “They may experience higher rates of depression than their heterosexual peers for many reasons, including not being accepted by parts of society, feeling ashamed of their sexual orientation or trying to hide their romantic relationships and being treated unfairly in school or at work.”

The researchers felt surprised that other factors — such as fewer social connections, drinking or smoking — didn’t have as great of an effect on LGB people’s cognitive function later in life. But, they also recognized the need for additional research to understand how the stressors sexual minorities experience earlier in life can lead to cognitive impairments as they age. Additionally, Hsieh said, they hope that the study’s findings shed light on the need for greater inclusivity for sexual minorities, as it can have an influence on their mental and cognitive well-being.

“Social inequality makes less privileged groups, including sexual minorities, more prone to develop cognitive impairment,” Hsieh said. “Making the society more just and more accepting of diverse sexuality may help prevent dementia and reduce related health care burden on society.”

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Trump-appointed judges void Florida bans on conversion therapy for children

Two south Florida laws that banned therapists from offering conversion therapy to children struggling with their sexual orientation or gender identity were declared as unconstitutional by a federal appeals court.

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Image by Juan Pablo Mascanfroni from Unsplash.com

Two south Florida laws that banned therapists from offering conversion therapy to children struggling with their sexual orientation or gender identity were declared as unconstitutional by a federal appeals court.

In the case – Otto et al v City of Boca Raton, Florida et al, 11th U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals, No. 19-10604 – the 11th US Circuit Court of Appeals sided (in a 2-1 decision) with two therapists who said the laws in the city of Boca Raton and Palm Beach County violated their free speech rights.

American Republican President Donald Trump – the loser in the country’s latest presidential election, and who refuses to concede – appointed the two judges who supported conversion therapy.

According to Circuit Judge Britt Grant, the laws “allow speech that many find concerning – even dangerous,” but the First Amendment “does not allow communities to determine how their neighbors may be counseled about matters of sexual orientation or gender.”

The therapists in the case, Robert Otto and Julie Hamilton, said their clients had “sincerely held religious beliefs conflicting with homosexuality,” and they sought counseling to conform their identities and behaviors with those beliefs.

A study by the Williams Institute at UCLA School of Law noted that 20 American states and Washington, D.C. already ban licensed healthcare professionals from conducting conversion therapy on children. The practice – which aims to change people’s sexual orientations or gender identities – stigmatizes lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people, and is linked to depression, anxiety and suicide.

The American Psychiatric Association (APA) also opposes conversion therapy, since the practice often assumes that homosexuality is a mental disorder.

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Lifestyle & Culture

Eat yourself healthy this winter

Would you like to know how to nourish your body to obtain excellent nutrition and quality of life? Let’s take a look.

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Having good nutrition is an essential aspect of life, the opposite means being exposed to diseases, lack of energy, and a poor quality of life. For this reason, your body needs the absorption of the necessary nutrients and the intake of substitute products that provide the body with the necessary energy to have good health.

Would you like to know how to nourish your body to obtain excellent nutrition and quality of life? Let’s take a look. 

Improve your health.

Often, the choices you make in life, what you eat and drink, have great importance since that means a healthy and active life. We all have different needs in calories, always according to our gender, age, and activity level. Health conditions play a role, too, even if you need to lose weight. In short, eating a healthy diet works in your favor because it can help you be at the right weight and always feel young and energetic. It can also help you with specific problems like heart disease.

Unquestionably a healthy diet keeps your body working at its best. The key? Choose only foods that are beneficial for your body. Good nutrition is based on the consumption of food groups so that the whole organism works correctly.

The grains

Whole grains are essential in any diet. The good news is that they are relatively easy to get. one of the significant advantages of grains is that they help us feel full longer and reduce the anxiety of wanting to put something sweet in our mouth between meals.

However, avoid those labels that say “rich.”

Fruits and vegetables

Fruits are vibrant on the palate, with a sugar type that does not affect our health and very low-fat content. Also, fruits and vegetables are high in fiber and many vitamins; they are the perfect food for our health. Therefore it is a mistake to try to add refined sugar, butter, and creams to fruits. Keep things simple, meaning steam, bake, or boil.

If you want to accentuate its flavor, you can add a little salt and olive oil and natural dressings, but avoid processed creams and cream cheese that are harmful to the body. Another option is peanut butter, which, apart from being delicious, has good fats for your body.

Protein

Protein is vital to us all, and therefore you could look at adding whey protein to your diet. In addition to this, you may want to include some meat as long as it is lean. As a suggestion, read the product label carefully; if it says “loin” or “leg,” it is a lean cut that is good for you. Some pork cuts, such as hams, have a layer of fat on the outside that, although delicious, is best removed before eating.

If you are seasoning the meat, avoid excess salt, and give preference to herbs and spices. Lean cuts will taste better with these cooking methods, and if you need to grease the pan, avoid processed butter and oils because they are life-threatening to your heart.

It’s time to get healthy; it is good for both the body and the mind.

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Lifestyle & Culture

Get up to date with what your business needs

Every business has to manage their finances. To do this, take a look at these tips.

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Every business has to manage their finances. So whether they’re wanting to cut down on their rental costs, invest in new markets or find the best delivery service for their goods, there are some new plans to adopt in their quest for this. To do this, take a look at these tips.

IMAGE SOURCE: PEXELS.COM

Look at your outgoings.

In addition, rethinking contracts and carrying out market studies to check competition levels is a strategy that can offer great savings opportunities for businesses. Therefore, improve your purchasing sector. In this way, this department will be able to find business partners that help it boost its business but that do not represent un-viable investments.

As controlling and reducing costs can cause the company to change suppliers, this possible change has to occur with the correct planning. This prevents this exchange from damaging the company’s workflow or the quality of what is offered to the customer.

Automate your cost management

Enterprise Resource Planning (ERP) is a solution that enables data integration throughout the enterprise. However, they do not offer all the subsidies for efficient cost management, especially when we want to understand the impact of indirect costs on various products and services. The tool also cannot simply model profitability analysis by customers, channels or regions, which is very critical today. Faced with this demand, companies offer advanced tools for managing costs, profitability and performance through software specifically designed for this purpose.

Reducing costs within a company is the best decision, especially in the face of a volatile and selective market. This decision requires investment in appropriate technology. And just the desire to achieve it is not enough if the company does not have the right tools for this mission.

Outsource Services

There is no reason for a company to absorb hiring and payroll costs from non-priority sectors. Therefore, when working with outsourced labor, the company gains efficiency, since it hires a partner specialized in that market to serve it. In addition, there is more freedom to demand results and compliance with what is agreed in the contract.

The business can also take advantage of the talents of its managers and HR professionals in the management and training of employees that are essential to the objective activity of the brand. Because controlling and reducing costs requires efficiency, outsourcing is a perfect alternative to achieve better financial results without interrupting internal activities. If you have a transport company you may want to look at bidding. Bidding on shipping loads is a good way to grow your trucking business and increase your revenue. If you want to bid on shipping loads, you should find out more beforehand.

Invest in Professional Training

While this topic seems more like an investment than a cost-cutting action, keep in mind that rework can negatively affect the bottom line of a business. So, make sure your employees receive proper post-hire training and are able to perform their duties.

Also, if you identify flaws, turn them into learning, using them as cases in internal training. That way, the company will be able to understand how to control and reduce costs through strategies that keep its staff motivated and feeling valued. After all, educating a professional, improving their performance, can be more beneficial to a company than trying to hire someone who already has certain professional qualities.

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Lifestyle & Culture

Learning to live with a health condition

If you wish to learn to live with a health condition, then, how can you? This can be a scary and ever-changing space, and it’s not apparent what the best wisdom is. With our tidbits of guidance below, we hope this time can feel a little less daunting.

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Increased societal awareness regarding the empowerment of minorities, the acceptance of non-heteronormative sexual and gender identities, and the true need for empathy regarding mental health has made strides in these last years. There’s a long way to go, but we’re on the right path.

That said, it’s also true that these problems are hardly an exhaustive list. It’s true to say that many of us can be subject to challenge and hardship in life, and perhaps the one issue that transcends cultures, borders, and classes is that of our health. Anyone can be surprised with a new health condition they must manage, and anyone must try to ensure a worthwhile quality of life as they adapt and adjust to their new responsibilities. Even those of us who are able-bodied should be able to understand that healthy regard for those less fortunate than ourselves is fundamental to a good and caring society.

IMAGE SOURCE: PEXELS.COM

If you wish to learn to live with a health condition, then, how can you? This can be a scary and ever-changing space, and it’s not apparent what the best wisdom is. With our tidbits of guidance below, we hope this time can feel a little less daunting.

Understanding The New Norms

Anyone with a health condition must navigate new norms. For some, this might suggest a chance in diet, a limit regarding how much they can eat, or more. It might be having to discuss with new friends or relatives just what your needs are, and how this might impact your ability to socialize. Moreover, it means researching into your condition and the careful handling of it. For instance, learning about how to increase the life of your hearing aid can ensure you’re cared for for longer, which, as things go, will help you feel more cared for.

Taking Responsibility

It’s important to take responsibility for your condition – to the extent that you can. This doesn’t mean that it was ‘your fault,’ or anything so horrible, rather that it’s important to know you have to make the best of it, and to stay grateful regardless. That’s easy for us to say as we can’t know the extent to which your life has changed in this way, but we can certainly recommend that this attitude can help anyone fight through anything. 

It might be that you rededicate yourself to exercise and a good diet after this wake up call. It could be that you simply try to be nicer and more empathetic to people. We hope this doesn’t come across as blunt or insensitive, but there are so many people out there that let their hardship improve them. You’ll no doubt be one of those people. In this way, you can always make the best of a bad situation.

Leaning On Others Is Okay

It’s fine to lean on others. We all need to from time to time. And, furthermore, people want to help. They want to be leaned on. They don’t like seeing someone they know struggling and only allowing themselves to do that alone. It makes them feel unwanted and unhelpful. So – enlist your family members or ask for help from your friends if you really need it. There’s no shame here. It’s why people assembling in groups in the first place – to be part of one another’s journey.

With this advice, we hope you can learn to live with a health condition in the best possible sense.

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Health & Wellness

Many transgender people who receive hormone therapy have unaddressed heart disease risks

The researchers found that more than half of the study participants (56.5%) had been previously diagnosed with a mental health disorder such as anxiety or depression, which is also associated with increased risk of heart disease.

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Photo by Sharon McCutcheon from Unsplash.com

Many transgender people who receive gender-affirming hormone therapy already have unaddressed heart disease risk factors such as high blood pressure and high cholesterol, even during young adulthood, according to new research presented via the American Heart Association.

“Previous research has shown that transgender individuals are less likely to have access to health care or to utilize health care for a variety of reasons, including stigma and fear of mistreatment,” said Kara J. Denby, M.D., lead study author and a clinical fellow in cardiovascular medicine at the Cleveland Clinic Foundation in Cleveland, Ohio. “Since transgender individuals have frequent physician visits while taking hormone therapy, this seems an opportune time to screen for cardiovascular risk factors and treat previously undiagnosed cardiovascular disease that can lead to poor health outcomes in the future.”

The researchers examined risk factors and medical history for more than 400 adults (56% assigned male sex at birth, mostly in their 20s and 30s) when they first sought care at the multidisciplinary transgender program at the Cleveland Clinic Foundation.

The researchers found that more than half of the study participants (56.5%) had been previously diagnosed with a mental health disorder such as anxiety or depression, which is also associated with increased risk of heart disease.

For participants without current heart disease, two scoring systems were used to estimate their risk of developing heart disease. The researchers found: 6.8% had undiagnosed high blood pressure; and 11.3% had undiagnosed high cholesterol.

Of those already diagnosed with high blood pressure, more than one-third had not been receiving recommended treatment. And, of those already diagnosed with high cholesterol, more than three-quarters had not been receiving recommended treatment.

“When we calculated the risk for developing a heart attack or stroke over 10 years, the risk for transgender men and women was higher than that reported for the average (person) of their age and gender. We also found that, even in the highest risk individuals, many were not receiving recommended treatment,” said Denby.

In addition, the researchers found that more than half of the study participants (56.5%) had been previously diagnosed with a mental health disorder such as anxiety or depression, which is also associated with increased risk of heart disease.

“Transgender individuals face numerous barriers and biases to access the health care they need. We owe it to them to improve access and care so they can improve their CVD health and overall well-being. Policies and health care structures that are safe and supportive are critical for the transgender population to achieve health equity,” Denby said.

The study, however, is limited by being a retrospective review of medical records. The results cannot be used to prove a cause-and-effect relationship between being transgender and the presence of heart disease risk factors.

Co-authors include Meghana Patil, M.D.; Karlo Toljan, M.D.; Leslie Cho, M.D.; and Cecile A. Ferrando, M.D., M.P.H. Author disclosures are in the abstract. The researchers reported no external funding sources.

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