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Beyond ‘mommy’ and ‘daddy’ as LGBT parents assume new names

Nearly 13% — 20% of the lesbian couples and 5% of the gay couples — participated in some version of “undoing gender”. They do this by using parental names from their native cultures or religions, particularly those that strip away the binary.

Changing self-identified titles when parenting.

About 13% of LGBT parents are “undoing gender” as far as the preferred titles used by/on them in parenting.

This is according to a study (which is currently under peer review) on the naming practices in same-sex adoptive families.

This study, done by Abbie E. Goldberg, Melissa Manley and Emma Frank, found that of 80 participants — 20 lesbian couples and 20 gay couples — recruited from adoption agencies across the US, all actually opted for derivatives of mother and father.

Specifically, nearly 13% — 20% of the lesbian couples and 5% of the gay couples — participated in some version of “undoing gender”. They do this by using parental names from their native cultures or religions, particularly those that strip away the binary.

Examples include: “mather”, which merges mother and father; “Maddie”, an amalgamation of mommy and daddy; newly created nicknames (like “Muzzie”); and “Abba”, which means dad in Hebrew

This study also suggested that the change in title used is because of the willingness to push boundaries because of hard-won LGBT rights, particularly the right to marry; and the desire to distinguish themselves from straight people and not assimilate in a heterosexual, patriarchal society.

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