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Ang prinsesa ng Divisoria

Meet Avril, here as part of #KaraniwangLGBT, which Outrage Magazine launched to offer vignettes of LGBT people/living. Avril finds some comfort in knowing “naay Guinoo (there’s God). Kung may problema, musimba mi; ma-Diyosnon (When we have problems, we go to church; we become believers).” Though for now, “lipay lang ko (I’m just happy),” Avril says.

Not that many people actually know her name. Instead, locals just know her as “kanang ga-pangayo ug P55.00 para sa chicken fillet (that one who begs for P55.00 for chicken fillet).” In fact, “kung hatagan nimo’g P20.00, mu-reklamo siya; tag-P55.00 daw ang chicken fillet (if you give her P20.00, she’d complain; she’d say that chicken fillet costs P55.00).”

She’s a “resident” of Divisoria in downtown Cagayan de Oro City – that is, because she’s homeless, she now partially resides in the plaza (i.e. Divisoria), her means of living mainly to beg for whatever passersby can give her.

Meet Avril – so called because “ga-admire ko kay (I admire) Avril Lavigne,” she said – the self-proclaimed “prinsesa sa (princess of) Divisoria.”

LIFE STEPS

Avril actually found her way to Divisoria sometime after 2011.

In December 2011, when tropical storm Washi (locally known as Bagyong Sendong) made a landfall over Mindanao, Cagayan de Oro City was among the places most affected. In fact, as per the International Federation of Red Cross and Red Crescent Societies, the storm took the lives of 1,472 people, with 1,074 more missing and 1,748 others injured. Total infrastructure damage reached billions of pesos.

Avril’s family – who lived in a barangay (village) called Indahag – was among those affected. “Nadaot tanan (Everything was destroyed),” she said.

Her family was relocated, but Avril left her family. “Mingaw man gud didto sa (It’s lonely in the) relocation site,” she said. With a friend, another transwoman, “sa plaza na mi nipuyo (we lived in the plaza).”

Avril’s parents – and her five siblings for that matter – were never cruel to her. In fact, “wala ko gikasab-an nga girl ko (I was never reprimanded for being a transgirl),” she said. “Mahadlok man sila nga mulayas ko (They feared that I’d run away).”

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Avril was “gi-palangga (beloved).” “Wala man ko gikulata sa balay. Ganahan sila nga ingun-ani ko kay naa mutabang a paglimpyo (I was never abused at home. They liked that I’m like this because I helped clean the house),” she said.

Avril also helped her mom do laundry. “Labandera man si mama. Isa ka balde, P100 bayad. Mga silingan ang gilabhan (My mom was a laundrywoman. For one pail of laundry, P100 is the payment. We did the neighbors’ laundry),” she said.

Whatever was earned added to her father’s earnings as a panday (blacksmith).

In hindsight, she has some good memories from home. “Nakatuon ko mag-bra sa akong ate (I learned how to use bra from my elder sister),” she said with a laugh. But she has bad memories from home, too. “Dili na ko ka-eskuwela kay gigisi sa ako magulang ako card – special child man gud siya (I can’t go back to school because my elder sibling tore my school car – that sibling is a ‘special child’),” she said.

Avril would occasionally cross paths with her family members, but she said “dili jud ko muuli. Ambot asa sila; bahala sila (I will never go home. I don’t know where they are; I let them be/I don’t care about them).”

Then, with a loud laugh, she said: “Friendship lang kaya ko ibigay sa kanila (I can only give them friendship).”

STARTING EARLY

Avril recalled having her first sexual experience when she was 12 years old, also with a 12-year-old. “Silingan namo (It was with a neighbor),” she said. “Pero sa baba lang [But it was just the mouth (i.e. oral sex)].”

She was 14 when she first had penetrative sex, this time with a 20-year-old man. “Fourteen ko nalubutan – siya jud naka-virgin (I was 14 when I was anally penetrated – he was the one who really devirginized me).”

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That sexual experience happened under Carmen Bridge, which is also know as the place where most of the homeless in Cagayan de Oro City head to wash up.

Nowadays, Avril continues to be sexually active. These sexual contacts happen “kasagaran sa kasagbutan (often, in grassy areas),” she said.

There were times in the past when – as a minor – she was taken by the City Social Welfare and Development (CSWD) with the other minors who also lived on the streets, “ganahan pud ko (I also liked that),” Avril said. “Reklamo ka pa, daghan laki dadto (How can you complain when there are many guys there)!”

Now that she said she’s no longer a “bata nga bantayunon sa CSWD (a child that CSWD has to look after),” Avril remains happy that “akong kinabuhi ako-a (I live my life the way I want).”

She claims to have a stalker – a taxi driver who is also (and without playing with words) a “client”. “Didto ko niya sa ngitngit kuhaon (He’d pick me up in dark areas),” Avril said. “Lami man pud kay humot man siya (It feels good, too, because he smells good).”

Avril prides herself of knowing safer sexual practices. “Mu-condom jud ko (I make sure I use condom),” she said. But for lubricant, she uses “cooking oil – mupalit ko sa tindahan (I buy from a convenience store).” And if cooking oil isn’t available, “Cream Silk na lang (I use Cream Silk shampoo).”

Avril had regular boyfriends before – one when she was 15, and another only recently. Both boyfriends left her when they met partners who were assigned female at birth.

Magkita mi, wala tagdanay (We see each other, we don’t pay attention to each other),” Avril said.

A DAY AT A TIME

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Sleeping on benches in the plaza isn’t easy, Avril said. “Kung muulan, sa ‘dorm’ mi mudayon (When it rains, we proceed to our ‘dorm’),” she said; that “dorm” referring to the façade of the Red Ribbon branch in Divisoria.

The begging doesn’t always go well, too, so that “kung dili muhatag, awayon (if they don’t give me anything, I quarrel with them),” she laughed. “Sultian nako: ‘Wala forever!’ Masuko sila [I tell them: ‘There’s no forever!’ They get angry).”

The expression “There’s no forever!” is used to highlight that no relationship lasts long/forever; and that everything ends.

Most people, though, remain nice to Avril. “Muhatag sila’g kuwarta. Usahay, mamata ko, naay pagkaon (They give me food. Sometimes, when I wake up, there’s food there),” she said.

But she still prefers receiving cash – preferably P55.00 – so she can buy “chicken fillet sa McDonald’s.”

Avril finds some comfort in knowing “naay Guinoo (there’s God),” she said. “Kung may problema, musimba mi; ma-Diyosnon (When we have problems, we go to church; we become believers).”

Avril, of course, eyes to have better life – “mu-eskuwela tingali (perhaps go back to school),” she said. But for now, “lipay lang ko (I’m just happy),” Avril ended.

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