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Ida and Sandy: From college love to building a family

Ida Ramos and Sandy Aloba were first introduced by friends in 1996 “because we kind of looked alike,” Ida recalls. Immediately falling for each other, they are now trying to form a family even with the challenges posed by society on those in LGBT relationships.

Ida and Sandy

Ida Ramos and Sandy Aloba first met in 1996 in college.

“Common friends introduced us because we kind of looked alike. We fell in love instantly,” Ida remembered.

It was, indeed, also love at first sight for Sandy.

“We are six years apart. I thought I was done with college, without any intention of graduating. But I came back to complete my thesis, met Ida, and the rest, as they say, is history. It was love at first sight, though it took us a few weeks to realize it. We did the ‘best friend’ thing for a bit before finally admitting we couldn’t live without each other,” Sandy said.

Now nearly two decades together, Ida and Sandy admit the challenges of being a lesbian couple in the Philippines.

“I guess one of the biggest challenges we face is when we are put in a box that falls under a certain ‘label’. To be honest, we rarely deal with it, but when we do, we tend to ignore it because we learned early on that you can’t change other people’s minds in an instant,” Ida said.

For Sandy, the biggest challenge is not being able to get married. “I cannot stand that I cannot make my girlfriend, the most important person in my life, the one I love the most in this world, my wife,” she said.

Yet even with these drawbacks, Ida and Sandy continue to celebrate the best parts of their love.

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“The best thing about this relationship is all of it. Everything in its entirety. This is my life. My life with Sandy. Our life together,” Ida said.

“Right now, the best thing about our relationship is the little demon/bundle of joy who is our son,” Sandy added.

Currently, Ida and Sandy are in the process of legally adopting their three year old son. He has been with them for almost two years now, but not on paper.

“Our future plans are like any other couple’s, I guess. To be financially secure, to provide our son with the best education we can afford, to be the cause and source of joy and happiness, both in our own home and to our friends and loved ones around us,” Sandy ended.

Written By

A registered nurse, John Ryan (or call him "Rye") Mendoza hails from Cagayan de Oro City in Mindanao (where, no, it isn't always as "bloody", as the mainstream media claims it to be, he noted). He first moved to Metro Manila in 2010 (supposedly just to finish a health social science degree), but fell in love not necessarily with the (err, smoggy) place, but it's hustle and bustle. He now divides his time in Mindanao (where he still serves under-represented Indigenous Peoples), and elsewhere (Metro Manila included) to help push for equal rights for LGBT Filipinos. And, yes, he parties, too (see, activists need not be boring! - Ed).

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