So Tar, my partee-going partner, has been feeling overwhelmed. There are changes in his life, particularly related to work, and these make him feel things.
He’s annoyed at times (like when he said he has to put up with a system that promotes people he thinks should not be in leadership positions because they don’t know shit). He’s exhausted most times (like when he sees his payment slip that, he said, proves that in the Philippines, even when one is overworking, you still don’t make a decent living). And he’s desperate at times (like when when he is reminded that things are stagnating).
Here’s the thing: with partee-goers, when such things are felt, using drugs almost always follows.
Yes, he knows injections of meth followed by days of fucking do not solve those problems, or deal with his feelings for them.
But it’s not called addiction for nothing.
The injection “numbs” the feelings, I was told; the nonstop fucking with the partee-goers prolongs the ecstasy coating those feelings.
This is something that those in relationships with partee-goers need to realize: that the way of coping of your loved one may be considered destructive. And they do it with people you worry would harm your loved one. But it’s a choice they make. Whether you agree or not. Your – our – choice is to stay… or to go. Depending on your capacity to put up with something like this.
This is but part of the life of being with a meth-head. It is not for everyone, yes. But for those who are open to being in one, at least you know what to expect. That your love is bound to cause you pain because your lover will chase “solutions” for whatever they’re feeling with others and not with you. But you learn to put up… always.
