Sometime in 2017, I met this HIV “advocate” who – after being mentored by a Metro Manila-based “expert” – established his own HIV organization in his hometown.
On the surface, it was actually a welcome development, particularly because all things related to HIV at that time were too Manila-centric (e.g. his mentor and other “experts”, the funding, decision-making, service delivery, et cetera). But then the NGO that this “advocate” established eventually folded. And the stories that emerged during the closure eventually served as “shock stories” to warn those who want to profit off HIV “advocacy”.
Like the claim/allegation of his ex-BF (who eventually moved overseas), stating that – while in bed, usually before or after sex or while they’re watching TV – the “advocate” made him sign fake receipts so that they can keep the money.
And like the claim/allegation of one LGBTQIA “advocate” (a “friend” of the HIV “advocate”, and who also has issues himself) who claimed that the HIV “advocate” used money that’s not his to buy a condo (among others).
No one really closely looked at what happened to the “work” that this “advocate” did. Or perhaps some people did, but whatever info that was gathered was kept from the public. So we do not know, as an example, if there were PLHIVs (the market he eyed to “serve”) who suffered because of what he did; then and even now, the impact of the alleged misappropriation is under some rug (as if just ignored).
But we know that – with these stories circulating – this “advocate” left HIV “advocacy” and just disappeared. At least for a while. He returned years later, though in a different capacity in a different sector.
And then he died.
And suddenly you see too many people giving him tributes, claiming that he “saved” lives, yada, yada. But just as info about what he allegedly did weren’t shared in the past, this time, no one – as in NONE – even mentions the bad that he did. Reading what’s written about him, it’s as if some messiah walked among us, instead of someone so flawed he was forced to leave HIV “advocacy” because of his alleged illegal activities.
And suddenly, I am not surprised he sort of got away with what he allegedly did. Because he was surrounded by enablers who – apparently – refused to call him out… when he was alive, and now that he’s dead. Kampihan lahat kahit sa pagkakamali (Siding with each other even in wrongdoings).
That belief in giving “dignity in death” isn’t a bad thing, yes. I am sure he may have touched lives. But erasure isn’t the way to go about this. Instead, it is recalling the good any person who died may have done along with the bad that he/she/they may have similarly done. Because the bad that he did may have harmed others, may have carelessly affected lives. And not even mentioning this makes those who solely pay him homages sans calling him out, too, just as bad for their revisionism.
